Is it possible for us as mothers to have hours of free time? Well according to Holly it is. I was reading Holly’s blog the other day and I came across a couple of things that really made me stop and think.
I’m not sure if you’ve ever read Holly’s blog but basically her readers ask her for advice and she responds. She always has really great advice. In the one that I was reading she was giving advice to a Mom who was struggling trying to find ‘free time’. Holly usually has about 3 hours of ‘free time’ in the afternoon and then most evenings are free to spend time with her husband. While reading, the one thing that she said that really hit me was “My kids all help out though, so this helps.” She was referring to the amount of house work that needs to be completed. With her kids helping her actual work load is quite a bit lighter.
Also she doesn’t look at projects such as gardening or sewing as work – more like “projects that I finally have the ‘chance’ to do, so perhaps it is an attitude issue for me – I FEEL free to choose what to do each day, or not to do.”
Lastly she said that “we keep the house basically tidy all week, and spotless once a week.” Since the baby was born I’ve been struggling with getting my house spotless – I used to be able to have one day a week of cleaning, however recently it’s been taking me a couple of days to get everything done. But I know that this will continue to get better as I continue to work on my MROL.
Up until I read this advice from Holly my kids didn’t help a whole lot with chores around the house, after all they’re only 3 and 2 – how can I expect them to really clean? They cleaned up their toys at nap and bed times but that was basically it. But really there is no reason why they can’t help out a little more. It really has to do more with my perfectionism. I have to make an effort to make sure and not redo what they have done (for 2 reasons – 1, it’s redundant and 2, if I’m going to want them to help with household chores I have to accept their best effort – if I redo what they’ve done they are going to feel inadequate and not want to help any more).
So basically I have to make an effort first to teach them to do the chores and then to allow them to do it their own way and not redo it. For example, my oldest has always liked to vacuum, but I always go behind him and redo or finish the job. I’ve got to just let him do it and accept it as done.
I have now taught them to clear their dishes from the table and put them in the dishwasher then they wash their hands and faces. I’m teaching the oldest to clean the toilet while the middle child & I clean the tub, while the oldest washes the floor, the middle child and I wash the walls. They also help with dusting and I’m going to get them back into making beds in the morning.
So I guess if I really look at things in my life I do have hours of free time. I spend about 2 hours a day of free time outside with the kids and then another 4 or 5 hours a day working. Now that my kids are helping more with chores I will find more time throughout the day and I believe that if I really work at my Mother’s Rule of Life I could find some ‘free time’ that was actually free and not spent working.
